Conspiracy theory: my co-worker is trying to make me fat. No seriously, at most places of business it's typical to have to skirt around treats at certain times: Halloween, basically from the end of November through December, and maybe Valentine's as well. For me it is an on-going battle.
Conspiracy theory aside, my co-worker is an awesome baker. And I am pretty sure know her true motives are that she loves to bake, she's extremely giving, and well....who would stop her from bringing in yummy treats?
Let me just provide you with a sampling of what I'm faced with. It's like cruel and usual punishment, except without the punishment because I've never passed any of it up.
Most recently it was a butter cake. Yep, you read that right - a but-ter cake! As in, I'm pretty sure butter exists in almost all baked goods, however, this particular good just happens to be named after it. You know what else is in it? Cream cheese and powdered sugar. It's huh-mazing.
Liv: 0 Butter Cake: 2 (because I had to have two pieces...one for breakfast and the other after lunch. Don't look at me like that! It was sitting right behind me all day, that's why.)
Prior to that, it was Halloween Oreo Pumpkin cheesecakes.
Liv - 0 Oreo cheesecakes - 1
Several times it has been what we have affectionately dubbed "chip cookies." As in she makes your typical cookie, sometimes regular sometimes with an oatmeal base, and then throws in every sort of "chip" from her pantry: ie, chocolate chips, peanut butter chips, white chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, etc. She even made me a holiday version with red and green M&Ms. And those, I'm proud to say, I did bring home to share with hubster. Because she's made these at least 3 times, I'm going to estimate: Liv - 0 Chip Cookies - 16
And that's not all, there has been a cheesecake, a red velvet cake, for my birthday she made a melted ice-cream cake.
Like I said, she's extremely giving and always shares. So even when she doesn't bring in a baked treat, if she goes to get herself a little chocolate she always asks if I want a square. Do I say no? Of course not. Who turns down chocolate?
Because of this my body now expects some sort of treat. Every. Day. Right after lunch. Like some sort of inalienable right.
And I'm not proud of what I'm about to tell you here, but two of those recipes....I sent her! Yes I did - because I know she loves to bake, and I don't bake because my husband doesn't love sweets as much as I do so 90% of all baked goods cooked in the Champion household would be eaten by yours truly. Therefore it was a Freudian slip me emailing her those recipes. I definitely didn't do it on purpose.
Something must be done, it has to stop. I'm researching ways to conjure up some willpower. Obi-Wan, Yoda - whomever - please grant me the force.
Until then, I'm off to tell my co-worker what kind of treats I want for V-day, because I kid you not....she. just. asked!
I have to admit, Liv is probably understating how often her co-worker provides treats. And it probably doesn't help that I can overhear everything they talk about, so I've threatened Liv's life multiple times if she says 'no' to any of the deliciousness. Because obvi I have to eat any leftovers.
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